HaTe ThE SiN AnD LoVe ThE SiNnEr

I need to start getting a decent sleeping schedule. I am so bored, I don’t know if I have ever been this bored. Life is a drab, so dull, so endlessly boring. It is just like a contemporary novel. Never struck to me that I will writing down all my thoughts and feeling for people to read? I am not a writer. I will never be a writer. Just that I didn’t think I would upkeep one. It’s like having a pet. Fun at the start but as the days goes by, it starts to get stale. Anyway it’s just one of those days again where I just want to bitch but no one’s online. So here I am …bitching on the cyber world on my blog.

During my holidays, I have been trying on the internet relay chat (mRIC). All my secondary friends once told me how fun it was making new friends in internet chat rooms and now I finally had a chance to get a taste of it. The internet really open up a whole new world for me. For someone like me who couldn’t really hang out with friends after chat or don’t really use the phone too often with friends, meeting people online and getting to know each other was like a new lease of life. Soon, I began frequenting other chat rooms as the variety of topics and interests were endless. I had always been the quiet one, shy kid but under the anonymity of the internet, it was just so easy to talk to people and even adopt different identities. Soon, I began chatting regularly with this other “netizen” who called herself as Lady May. She is just an average Malaysian lady who is relatively intelligent, decent looking and an all around nice lady. We both shared so many things in common, from our tastes in music, books and movies, and even our ideas about life. We met up regularly at this particular chat room called #singnet_yoursay in which everyone knew each other. We became really good friends, sharing secrets and disgusting things I probably wouldn’t even tell my closest friends. Whenever I had problems at school or misunderstandings with my parents, she would be the first people I would turn to for help or advice. I felt she was the closest people in my life and even one day spent away from the chat room felt like an eternity.

So here is the twist, she is in a relationship that so far has only been online, thus she is not completely sure of things. As a result of this, she needs a friendly advice from me. She told me she wants to be with him and love him but I wonder with her being from Malaysia and the guy is from Singapore…can it really work? Aside from the fact that they have yet to meet in person (eventually have to if this is going any further). The cultural and the organizational differences are also something that worries me. My heart keeps saying this is an online relationship, how serious can it really be. From the way this lady may explained to me how this man has ruined her life, destroying her dreams, asking her to sent him money so that he can top up his top-up card, he is not so great after all. The only reason he know what life is because he tried gaining people’s sympathy through love. That’s just tasteless. I am pretty sure that mike lee is some hedonistic post teen or a fat ugly fucker with no personal life whatever. So why should we give him the light of day? Some guys can be so HOPELESS!

If I am lady may, I would have left him a long time ago. No matter how good someone looks, it is sick and tiring of putting up with his shit. He only garners attention by being a money grubber and using love as a medium of his crime. I heard that she already find someone new & may things work out between them. She is delightful and kind and more than I had ever hoped for. If anyone has any helpful non-judgmental advice for this lady may. I would love to hear from you. I know the odds of her making it to old age with someone new are not very good statistically and I want to be careful of fixing whatever this mike lee has done to her but I am not sure if I broke anything? Has anyone found out some formula for relationships that helps? Sincerely, searching, Muhammad Afiq. In conclusion, to all the people out there who suffered the hurt and pain which are inescapable in any relationship, don’t despair for true love is seldom found the first time round especially when you are online.

A letter i wrote to that bastard on behalf of lady may

Hello Mike,

Hi! Well, it's pretty difficult to write this letter. It may be a surprise to you to get an email from me. But I have been wondering how best to tell how I feel about May Loh. I thought an email would be most appropriate. Probably because you do not know me but through May Loh I know you for I’m her chatter friend from Singapore aged 19 she dotes on me like a brother and she often confide in me. When she goes to Singapore every time, she will call me. I really do not know if what I have to say constitutes good advice. Perhaps it will help you see your options more clearly thereby help you to make a decision, so the things I'm going to say might not make any sense to you right now. So what I'll do is just give you a few pointers.

I know this sister is real and she really cares and love you from the time since 2002 I know her. One thing though is I could hear from her voice that she is extremely gloomy and she really long for your love. She wants to be with you. She loves you more than words could ever express. Although, you were younger than her, you taught her how to express herself as a true woman of the millennium. I am sure she is sincerely apologize straight from the heart that for ignoring and being rude to you even thought you already instructed the DO’s and Don’ts. Personally, I believe that you are a very patient man, and I thank you for that. I am also sure that she doesn’t ever want to take your advantage of your patience, not ever. I know that she often over react a lot; on behalf of her I am really sorry. I know her as a charismatic demure woman and given the fact that she waited for you for so long I just hope her wish will be granted that you can get her to work in Singapore so that she can be with you. Through the times of talking to her I sincerely can say that this sister has a heart of love for you and deep inside I wish for this sister to be happy and that you will love her.

Once she told me that she have found her soul mate, her life mate, and her true love, and I do believe that she has found herself a new guy, that’s you! Even though, she freaked me out with about her obsession about you, I have this to say and her words are sincerely from my heart to you and Mr. Mike I wish you all the superlative and exultant days. You are a very lucky guy to have a sister May Loh to wait and love you like that which many guys don’t have such privilege to meet one die hard girl to love you. I can never imagine how it would be like if she were to lose you. I don’t even want to think about it. All she wants is you and you alone because you are the love of her life.

Would you kindly let this love struck girl know if she stands any chance at all with you? I eagerly await your reply from May LoH.

All the best and good luck for your future endeavors.

Everybody now: Heavy sighs